Home Adult Talks Part 1: Never Assume These Absurd Things Are Normal in a Relationship …
Part 1: Never Assume These Absurd Things Are Normal in a Relationship …

Part 1: Never Assume These Absurd Things Are Normal in a Relationship …

4
0

absurd

Fortunately, there’s been a lot of psychological research into healthy and happy relationships the past few decades and there are some general principles that keep popping up consistently that most people are unaware of or don’t follow. In fact, some of these principles actually go against what is traditionally considered “romantic” or normal in a relationship.

Below are the most common tendencies in relationships that many couples think are healthy and normal, but are actually toxic and destroying everything you hold dear. Get the tissues ready.

Prev1 of 7Next

(4)


1

absurd

1. Forcing S*x

Forcing S*x You’re not required to have s*x with your partner every single time he’s in the mood. If you don’t want to sleep with him, then don’t do it. You should only engage in intercourse if it’s what you both want in the moment. If he’s the only one feeling frisky, then he can take care of his needs with his own two hands.

Prev1 of 7Next

(4)


absurd

2. Emotional Abuse

Most people assume that abuse consists of a person putting their hands on another person. However, your boyfriend might abuse you by using his words. If he always talks down to you, orders you around, or tells you that you’re a horrible person, then you should leave the relationship ASAP. Emotional abuse isn’t normal. It’s just as dangerous as physical abuse is.

Prev1 of 7Next

(4)


-->

absurd

3. The Relationship Scorecard

The “keeping score” phenomenon is when someone you’re dating continues to blame you for past mistakes you made in the relationship. If both people in the relationship do this it devolves into what I call “the relationship scorecard,” where it becomes a battle to see who has screwed up the most over the months or years, and therefore who owes the other one more. A very simple example is “You were an asshole at Cynthia’s 28th birthday party back in 2010”, it has proceeded to ruin your life ever since. Why? Because there’s not a week that goes by that you’re not reminded of it. But that’s OK, because that time you caught her sending flirtatious text messages to her co-worker immediately removes her right to get jealous, so it’s kind of even, right? The relationship scorecard develops over time because one or both people in a relationship use past wrong doings in order to try and justify current righteousness.Not only are you deflecting the current issue itself, but you’re ginning up guilt and bitterness from the past to manipulate your partner into feeling wrong in the present.
If this goes on long enough, both partners eventually spend most of their energy trying to prove that they’re less culpable than the other, rather than solving the current problem. People spend all of their time trying to be less wrong for each other instead of being more right for each other.

Prev1 of 7Next

(4)


-->

absurd

4. Doing Everything around the House

Doing Everything around the House You’re not Cinderella, so you shouldn’t be the only person doing chores around the house. The workload should be divided evenly between the two of you. It’s not fair for you to be forced to do all of the cooking and cleaning while he lounges around on the couch. He needs to put in effort, too.

Prev1 of 7Next

(4)


-->

absurd

5. Dropping “Hints” and Other Passive-Aggression

Instead of stating a desire or thought overtly, your partner tries to nudge you in the right direction of figuring it out yourself. Instead of saying what’s actually upsetting you, you find small and petty ways to piss your partner off so you’ll then feel justified in complaining to them. It only shows that you two are not comfortable communicating openly and clearly with one another. A person has no reason to be passive-aggressive if they feel safe expressing any anger or insecurity within the relationship. A person will never feel a need to drop “hints” if they feel like they won’t be judged or criticized for it.

Prev1 of 7Next

(4)


-->

absurd

6. Lying about Everything

Lying about Everything Your boyfriend is always going to tell you little white lies. He’ll fib about the gift he bought you for Christmas and how much money he spent at the bar. However, if he tells you lies every single day, it’s a problem. You two should be able to trust each other. If you know he’s hiding the truth from you, then there’s no reason for you to continue dating him

To Be Continued …

Prev1 of 7Next

(4)

Ads - Advertise Here

-->
tags:
  4

LEAVE YOUR COMMENT

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Close