The basic thing is jumping through hoops often has a negative outcome, he sees it as an opportunity to have his cake and eat it too. But when you stay outside his reach, he’ll stay on his best behavior.
Let’s look at how one relationship unfolded when the woman was willing to jump through hoops. It’s a classic scenario. Sarah bought an airplane ticket to go see a man she’d met only once before when he had been in town for a holiday weekend. They’d kept in touch for a month via e-mail and over the phone. Convinced he was “the one”, Sarah decided she’d like to see him again.
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The ticket cost more than 30thousand. He agreed to pay for the accommodations, which ended up being 8thousand for the hotel. After Sarah arrived, they had s8x in the hotel. Then he took her to a coffee shop with coupons that were complimentary with the room. Afterward they had s8x again.